Cries of an Angel
by Aentiaa
Summary: One minute Lovino is getting a drink at a gas station, the next he wakes up in a cabin in the middle of the woods with no memory of how he got there with a strange man named Antonio sitting beside him. The pair decide to try and bring back his memories and find a way to get him home. However, Antonio is hiding something from Lovino, something to do with why he went missing. SPAMANO
1. Chapter 1: The Events That Passed

Cries of an Angel

Chapter 1: The Events That Passed

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_To be honest, I have no I idea why I was so hateful. Looking back on it now it was sort of meaningless. I just couldn't manage that all important smile other people seemed to do so easily. I had a barrier around my heart and wouldn't allow anyone to cross over it. But now, none of that matters. Nothing really matters anymore. I am but a caged animal that has nothing else to do but doodle into a small book. Most of the others don't even have this though, I should count myself lucky for having something other to do. The pain, it distracts me from it. I should at least be thankful for that._

The night sky was illuminated only by the full moon and the surrounding stars. No other sources of light could be seen from there; no other people could be heard. The only sounds that could be heard were the rushing wind and the rain pelting down onto the ground. The small wooden cabin was surrounded by a forest of ancient trees, trees that hadn't been see by people for years.

The cabin was of something you'd see in a horror movie. Broken in windows, a door off the hinges, a cracked roof and walls made from grey cracked wood panelling. There were no paths that lead there; there was nothing around it for ages. It would be the ideal abode for a hermit who wanted to never come in contact with society ever again.

There wasn't much inside of the cabin either, there were only very few things inside. An old bed with only a thin white sheet placed on top of it, a dresser with a drawer missing, a small table with cracked tableware on top of it and a stainless steel that had no access to running water. However, something foreign to the cabin had appeared inside of it. A pair, an unusual pair.

One of them had eyes as green as the forest around them and as full of life. His hair was a deep brown and sopping wet from the rain. His breath was fast and heavy; his clothes were clinging tightly to his body. None of this mattered to him though; the only thing that mattered to him was the person he was carrying in his arms. The unconscious, injured and equally as sopping wet person he was holding onto.

"You'll be fine Lovino, I promise. I promised you back then and I'll make sure I keep it" the green eyed man, Antonio, whispered. He walked forward, his eyes downcast and carefully laid the other man, Lovino, down on the bed. Antonio just looked at Lovino for a while. Antonio's face showed no trace of any emotion, not a single one. He looked the other up and down; he was definitely in serious trouble. The plain white bandage wrapped around Lovino's head was also dripping wet and wouldn't be of much use in that state.

"I'm just going to change the bandages, okay Lovi?" he whispered. He kept his voice low when he spoke just as a precaution. He had no idea if any of them were nearby. For all he knew they could be standing right outside the cabin as he spoke.

Antonio took the spare bandages from his pocket and gripped them tightly in his hand. He knew he had to use the supplies he had sparingly since he couldn't sneak out much with him. He couldn't leave wet bandages around the younger man's head either. He knelt down and placed the fresh bandages beside him and began to unravel the wet bandages from around the other's head. He gingerly unwrapped the bandages as if the cloth was made of glass and could shatter if he pressed it too hard.

Once he had finished he stared at the large gash on the brunet's head. The dried blood surrounding the injury made Antonio squirm. He had no towel to wipe it off his head; he needed to think of something fast. His attention turned to his sleeve and he formed an idea. He quickly ripped a strip off the sleeve of his shirt and held it out the window so it would absorb the rain water. After he was satisfied he returned to his unconscious companion and began to wipe the blood off his head. He hoped somehow this would also wipe away what he had just seen hours before. He knew he had to be strong though and continue to look after Lovino, no matter the cost.

After cleaning and re-bandaging the wound Antonio sat beside the bed and leant against the frame. He ran his hand through his hair and deeply sighed. He had never wanted to move so much in his whole life. He just wanted to get Lovino out of this place and get him proper medical attention. His wounds weren't that great but he couldn't help but be concerned.

"Where am I?" whispered a voice. Antonio's eye instantly darted over to the bed and to his now conscious friend staring up at the roof, chocolate brown eyes wide open. A large grin quickly spread across Antonio's face, his heart felt tight.

"Lovi, thank God you're awake! I was so worried! Do you feel okay?" exclaimed Antonio as he stood up beside the Italian.

"Who are you? What am I doing here?" demanded Lovino. His voice sounded cold and harsh but his eyes exerted immense fear. Lovino pressed himself against the wall facing Antonio and curled his knees up to his chest. It was a position of safety and set up a barrier between him and the other man.

"Stop joking around Lovi! We made it! We're safe!" replied Antonio excitedly. Antonio had a sinking feeling in his stomach, something didn't seem right. Lovino was acting like he had when they first met.

"Tell me who you are bastard! What is this place!? What did you do to me!?" yelled Lovino. The chain of questions came out of his mouth at an incredible speed. The speed was driven by fear and the feeling of being cornered. The feeling in Antonio's stomach became more intense with every word Lovino spoke.

"Lovi, are you feeling okay?" asked Antonio.

"How do you know my name?" asked Lovino. Panic began to rise in Antonio. Suddenly, the sound of the pouring rain seemed to fade away and the rush of the wind seemed to become silent. All of his attention was focused on the idea that Lovino could potentially not even remember who he was.

"Of course you know me don't you Lovi!?" asked Antonio.

"My name's Lovino, get it right" he spat. Antonio stared at him, motionlessly. He was waiting for him to say "You're such an idiot" or "You're so easy to fool bastard!" However, no matter how long he waited, no sentence of that kind escaped his lips.

"But I've always called you Lovi! You said I could!" yelled Antonio frantically. Lovino flinched as Antonio's voice was raised. He took Lovino by the shoulders and began to shake him.

"Get off me!" screamed Lovino as he pushed the taller man off him with all the strength he could muster. Antonio fell of the bed and lay still on the floor looking up at the other man.

"Lovino, do you remember anything? Anything at all?" he asked.

"I remember stopping off to get a drink and then waking up here" replied Lovino harshly. Antonio lifted his hand up into the air and stared at his palm. Lovino looked at the older man confused and wondered what exactly he could possibly be doing. He was so aggressive only a few seconds ago.

"I'm such an idiot. I should've just waited a little longer. I got too full of myself" he muttered to himself. He let his hand fall gracelessly onto his face which covered his features.

"What are you going on about?" asked Lovino as he peered over at Antonio. His eyes widened when he saw his whole face. Tears were running down his face, they showed no sign of stopping.

"What's wrong with you?" asked Lovino. Antonio bit down on his lip and removed his hand from his face. Although he was most definitely crying it seemed like he couldn't control it.

"So you definitely don't remember anything?" asked Antonio, "you're not joking?" Lovino nodded his head in response. Antonio sat up and managed a weak smile.

"If that's the case then I guess I'll have to introduce myself. My name's Antonio Fernandez Carriedo" Antonio said. Lovino stared at the other man with his weak smile and running tears. There was just something so familiar about him that he couldn't out his finger on. Especially that combination of sadness and happiness, he knew that face from somewhere before.

"Antonio huh?" he asked, "how the hell do you know my name?"

"Well, I know you, I guess" replied Antonio.

"Then how come I don't remember you?" asked Lovino. Answering these questions was breaking Lovino's heart. The way things were going there could only be one explanation. Somehow, he had lost his memory.

"I think that maybe… you have amnesia" he stated quietly.

"A-Amnesia?" asked Lovino.

"Yeah, it would explain why you can't remember anything at all" replied Antonio. Antonio's tone was low and hushed. It was if he if he didn't want to say it, he didn't want to accept the possibility that such a thing had happened. He had expected things to possibly go wrong but he never even imagined something like this to happen, he didn't want to think it could.

"Then… how… why?" muttered Lovino. No matter how hard Antonio tried he couldn't come up with an answer to Lovino's question. He couldn't just tell him to believe in him and trust him. It took him long enough when they first met. He knew Lovino and he knew the man wouldn't just blindly trust someone he just met. However, he needed to try and earn his trust. Getting out of the area relied on that factor.

"Lovino, I need you to listen to me. If you haven't noticed you've got a pretty serious injury to your head. I know all of this must be pretty shocking for you but we need to get you to a hospital just to make sure you're all okay, aside from the memory loss. Also, do you feel that dull pain in your leg? Since you haven't been moving around too much you haven't noticed it but you hurt it quite a bit. We need to get out of here and get to the hospital and then I'll answer any questions you have" explained Antonio calmly.

"Why should I trust you? For all I know you kidnapped me and brought me here" spat Lovino.

"There's no reason for you to trust me really. However, you're not going to get very far with that leg and head of yours are you?" replied Antonio sternly. Acting like this wasn't in his usual character but he knew he could persuade Lovino this way. Sometimes you just have to be harsh with people in order to gain their respect and cooperation.

* * *

"Are you ready to go Lovino?" asked Antonio.

"No, but I never will be" replied Lovino. There was no doubt the Italian had retained his personality.

"Okay, so just hop onto my back and I'll carry you!" exclaimed Antonio. Lovino looked at Antonio like he had grown a third head. He couldn't believe this guy wanted him to just willingly jump on his back.

"You can't be serious!" yelled Lovino. Regardless of his protest, Antonio turned around and waited for Lovino to do as he instructed. Lovino groaned and got onto Antonio's back, he knew he had no other choice.

"Alright, let's get going then" said Antonio happily. He acted happy for the sole purpose of making the situation better for Lovino. Deep down he felt like someone had stabbed pins into his heart and left them there so he could bleed. His mind kept running through the possibility that maybe this was just some kind of nightmare and he'd wake up any minute. However, with every step he took the world around him grew more and more real. It soon became apparent that this was not a dream and that this was the cruel reality fate had laid out for him.

"So we're going to the hospital right? How far away is that?" asked Lovino. His voice invaded Antonio's thoughts; it was always good at doing that.

"I'd say about an hour. How come, does something hurt?" asked Antonio.

"What's it to you?" snapped Lovino.

"Sorry, just asking. If you don't say anything though and you pass out I won't be able to tell the people at the hospital what's wrong with you and it'll take longer to get you better. Wouldn't it be better just to tell me then?"suggested Antonio. Lovino bit his cheek; he hated how right he always was.

"Fine, my head hurts like a bitch and my leg isn't too great either. On top of that I'm tired and just want to go home" complained Lovino. Giving Lovino a free pass to complain is like holding a red cloth in front of a bull, they don't stop.

"Just go to sleep then, I'm not going to do anything if you do" suggested Antonio. Antonio pondered whether or not he should allow him to fall asleep or not based on the fact that he may never wake up. He decided to take the chance based on the cold hard fact Lovino would defy him anyway.

"As if!" yelled Lovino. Unfortunately for the Italian though, he fell asleep straight after he spoke.

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Author's Note: Hey guys! Thank you for reading this. Now, there is actually a reason why I'm writing Spamano. I was browsing random Hetalia pairings online, because I have a life, and saw there's actually a strip where Spain practically asks Romano to marry him and he pretty much says yes. Yes I'm being serious. So this is a celebratory fic :D

Also, tableware being on the table? That's impossible. Another thing, I was so tempted to write 'he fell asleep straight after he spoke… and never woke up. End' I can't help the way I am T^T


	2. Chapter 2: Were That Of A Nightmare

Cries of an Angel

Chapter 2: Were Something Of A Nightmare

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Antonio realized he had a certain power. This new power wasn't something like you'd see in a comic book or TV show. No, it was nothing that impossible. Antonio realized that he had the ability to rewrite history. This power, however, could only be used on one certain person and he only had a single shot at it. If he messed it up then he wouldn't get a second chance, that would be it.

Things were not that easy though, an internal battle was raging inside him mind over how to use the power. If he went for his first idea then he would bring back the memories of that time and he would be telling the truth. However, he did not want him to remember that time; it would cause him so much pain. If he went ahead with his second idea though he would save him the suffering but he would also be lying to the only person he cared for.

These thoughts swirled around Antonio's head as he sat in the pure white hospital room. The duo had managed to make it to the next town within an hour and Lovino was emitted into the hospital. Fortunately there seemed to be no permanent damage to either of the two aside from the large gash on Lovino's head that will supposedly leave a scar according to the doctor. Antonio was still worried about his companion though regardless, he hadn't woken up since he fell asleep on his back. He had been pacing around the room only moments before but decided to sit back down after accidently bumping into an elderly lady and spilling her coffee. His nerves were definitely getting the better of him.

"Please wake up soon Lovi" whispered Antonio. He got up from his plush blue seat and walked over towards Lovino. He held his hands in one of his and looked down at his face. The sterile and clean hospital room seemed to fade away to Antonio. All he could see was Lovino's face and the tears beginning to cloud his vision. He couldn't understand why he was crying over this, he knew Lovino was going to wake up soon. Still, seeing the Italian like this, lying motionless in a hospital bed, made his heart sink. He just couldn't get Lovino's words out of his head. He always wanted to have a place in Lovino's heart and when he didn't even recognize him he wanted to curl up and die.

"Let go of my hands you damn bastard!" yelled Lovino. Antonio instantly released his grip on Lovino's hands at the sound of the other's voice. Lovino folded his arms over his chest and glared up at the Spaniard.

"Lovino, thank God you're awake! I was so worried!" exclaimed Antonio.

"Where the hell am I now!? Is this a hospital?" asked Lovino.

"Yeah, we made it into town. You fell asleep on my back on the way here, remember?" asked Antonio. Lovino looked at Antonio flabbergasted, he was convinced he must have heard the Spaniard wrong.

"There's no way I would've fallen asleep on you! You probably drugged me and dragged me here!" exclaimed Lovino. Antonio looked utterly shocked at Lovino's accusation; he would never do such a thing!

"Don't you remember being on my back though? Your leg was too hurt to walk" explained Antonio frantically. Lovino went silent and began to think to himself. Suddenly, the memory hit him like a pile of bricks. Instead of feeling ashamed or embarrassed Lovino felt extremely angry at himself. What kind of idiot would pass on some stranger's back?

"Crap!" yelled Lovino. Lovino faced the Spaniard and then noticed his arm. Antonio's left arm was in a white sling due to an injury from the day before. When the brown eyed man saw this he realized that Antonio must've been carrying him on his injured arm.

"Is something wrong Lovino?" asked Antonio. Antonio could only imagine the possible things that Lovino would say to him. Most of them insulting and rude. That's the way Lovino was though and Antonio actually liked how honest he was.

"That sling just isn't for show right? What happened to your arm?" asked Lovino.

"Oh, this? Yesterday I dislocated my shoulder. When I got here they said I should put it in a sling" explained Antonio cheerfully.

"But weren't you carrying me yesterday? Did you hurt it after that or something?" asked Lovino. Lovino couldn't even consider the possibility that this man, who seemed familiar in some way, would do such a thing for him. Then again, he really didn't know anything about the other man. All that he knew was that his name was Antonio and he had a tendency to cry over what Lovino considered stupid reasons.

"No, my arm's been hurt for a while now actually. But that doesn't matter, all that matters is we're both alive right!?" cheered Antonio with a large smile. Lovino couldn't believe what he was hearing, that was so selfless! Lovino had no doubt that if he was in that situation he would've left Antonio to die. It sort of made him feel bad, but only very slightly.

"So… you carried me like that?" asked Lovino.

"Well, I guess so. It hurt a lot! It was worth it though because you're safe now!" explained Antonio happily. Before Lovino could reply the door to his hospital room was opened by a doctor. The doctor, Toris Lorinaitis, was a young man with brown hair that almost reached his shoulders. He was one of the top doctors at the hospital and was highly respected by his peers. He stood in the doorway and smiled at the two men already in the room.

"I see you're awake Lovino. Are you feeling okay?" asked Toris as he stepped into the room and beside Lovino's bed.

"My head hurts a bit but that's about it" replied Lovino.

"Do you think you can sit up for me?" asked Toris. Lovino put his hands either side of him and began to lift himself up. At the same time Antonio took his pillow, fluffed it and placed it back on the bed at a ninety degree so Lovino could lean against it.

"Thanks" muttered Lovino. He leant his head against the pillow and faced Toris. Toris smiled, took a pen out of his coat pocket and wrote something down on a clip board he was carrying with him.

"Very good. Now, your friend there filled out most of your information for me so you don't need to do any of that. I have to go talk to my supervisor for a minute, I'll be back soon okay" stated Toris.

"Okay, thank you doctor" said Antonio with a smile. Toris nodded his head in reply and quickly left the room. He didn't want to keep his supervisor waiting, no one did really. Everyone was too terrified of the guy to show up late to any meeting with him. He had this way of being creepy by smiling, something that's more terrifying than it may seem. When Lovino was sure the doctor had left the room he turned to Antonio and glared at him.

"How the hell do you know all of my information!?" barked Lovino.

"Well, you told me. You probably don't remember telling me but you did" explained Antonio.

"What's my full name?"

"Lovino Vargas."

"How old am I?"

"Twenty-two."

"Do I have any siblings?"

"Yes, you have a little brother named Feliciano Vargas." Suddenly, Lovino went quiet and a panicked look spread across his face. He grabbed Antonio by the shoulders and pulled him closer. He stared Antonio straight in the eyes with his pleading ones.

"My brother! Did something happen to my brother!? Where is he?" yelled Lovino. Antonio put his hands on Lovino's shoulders and looked at him sternly.

"Lovino, I didn't want you to find out this but… considering from what you've told me" he took a deep breath before continuing the rest of the sentence, "It's almost been one year since you went missing."

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Author's Note: DUN DUN DUUUUUUN. That's like ending it with 'Lovino, I'm preggas. Call MTV'. That was so totally funny… I shouldn't tell jokes. You little stalker Antonio, knowing everything about Lovino there. What do you guys even think Toris was writing down? Tell me in the reviews. That is if I get any reviews. If I don't that'll be pretty sad. Anywaaaaaaay thank you for reading :D


	3. Chapter 3: I Used To Cry

Cries of An Angel

Chapter 3: I Used To Cry

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_I wonder if I'll be here until I die? The way they feed me you'd think they want me to die of starvation. Yet, it seems they're giving me just enough to stay alive. Then again, he sometimes gives me extra rations. There must be something wrong with that guard; he seems way too nice to work at a place like this. Then again, he's much better than that other guard who always looks me up and down, I don't feel safe around him. Then again, I don't think anywhere here is safe for any of us. I used to feel like crying but it's as if I've run out of tears. _

"What do you mean it's been one fucking year since I went missing?!" yelled Lovino. His brown orbs glared daggers at the Spaniard as he gripped tightly onto his shoulders. Antonio couldn't bring himself to meet the Italian's gaze so he instead looked down at the floor biting his lip. A lump formed in Antonio's throat, stopping him from speaking. He didn't know how to answer the other man.

"Answer me bastard!" demanded Lovino.

"I found you a year ago" whispered Antonio when he finally found his voice. Lovino's grip tightened and he pulled Antonio closer.

"What do you mean you found me?! What the hell is going here?! Answer me, Antonio!" cried Lovino. His grip lessened and he bowed his head. His burst of anger was wearing off and a wave of sadness and anxiety instead took its place and washed over him completely. But no, he was too proud to cry in front of someone he saw as a stranger. He wouldn't let his tears fall as long as the other man was near him.

"I met you one year ago" muttered Antonio. His tone sounded believable right? It wasn't cracking was it? Antonio was sure he sounded like he was telling the truth. He knew what he was doing was wrong, he knew Lovino would much prefer to know the truth. But not now. No, it was too soon. He didn't want the one most precious to him to have to remember the things that happened to him. The suffering, those tears that constantly escaped. He never wanted to see them ever again. If lying was what it took to protect him then he would lie forever. There was nothing more important to him than Lovino's smile. He promised himself that

"Are you sure you want me to explain this to you right now? I mean, you really shouldn't get worked up how you are Lovi?" asked Antonio gently. He would tell Lovino the truth one day, but not until he was sure he could take the memories. There was nothing wrong with that, right?

"Yes, please tell me" begged Lovino. The Spaniard took a deep breath in and collected his thoughts. A pang of guilt still swelled inside of him but as long as his lies would protect the Italian he could live with that.

"I met you about six months ago Lovino. A close friend of mine had recently been admitted into a hospital and I went to visit him. I still remember the look in your eyes when I first saw you. Your eyes were pleading someone, anyone, to come and save you. As I walked past your hospital room and looked into your brown orbs I couldn't help but stare back at you. I decided to keep walking though and instead go to my friend's room. He was alright, only banged up slightly but still able to smile. So I soon left his room and once again I was caught in your gaze. In a spur of the moment decision I decided to go and visit you. You didn't really say much but I talked to you. About my life, about everything really. On my way out I decided to ask the nurse about you, she was happy to tell me after some casual flirting.

Apparently you had been in an accident that left you badly injured. They couldn't track down any of your relatives for some reason, you did tell me about them though. I decided to come and visit you again, and again. Eventually, I was visiting you every day. It took a while but I got you to smile. After five months you said something you me one day that I will never forget, 'I want to escape, with you.' So we planned to escape in one month after that, which was yesterday. We managed to somehow escape from the ward but we happened to run across some unsavoury people. I tried to protect you from them but they hurt you. Trying to escape you were thrown backwards and you hit your head which knocked you unconscious and apparently gave you amnesia. We escaped here and I had to take you back to a hospital of course. Fortunately there was another hospital further away, this hospital, where the doctors don't know about your previous injuries."

Lovino stared blankly at the Spaniard standing closely to him. Antonio's emerald eyes never strayed from the seemingly fragile Italian in front of him.

"Lovi?" asked Antonio. He opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by Lovino flinging himself into the elder man's arms sobbing violently. He body shook from the intensity of his cries, his eyes scrunched closed. He wrapped around his arms around the Spaniard's waist and pressed his head into his chest. Antonio managed a watery smile and wrapped his arms around the Italian's waist. He felt a strong sense of dejavu as he did this. The sight of a sobbing Italian, who looked like he might break if you into his touched him, sobbing chest even though the Italian had only just met him. It was just like when they first met, it was just like the moment Antonio found himself wanting to quit his lifestyle more than ever.

"It's okay Lovino, I know you must be scared, I would be too, but crying really doesn't suit you. I'm sure if you weren't as afraid and back to being your normal self you'd be punching me right now. But don't cry Lovi, it'll be okay" soothed Antonio. Lovino's sobbing seemed to have died down and were returning to a more controllable state. It seemed to only hit him then that he was crying into the chest of someone he didn't know and pulled away quickly.

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**Author's Note: **I don't update very much, do I? Sorry for how long it took me to get this up! It's a pretty short chapter but at least it's something? We got five reviews on the last chapter, yay! :D Thank you for reading :D


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